The Gift of Goodbye

Saying goodbye is a journey. You have it all planned out in your head. How you will say it, the little speech and the final send off. I was watching a mother saying goodbye to her daughter the other day, she had it all figured out. Right up to the moment when her daughter left and she didn't know if she would ever see her again. Then the goodbye began. She broke into tears and cried for the next few months. 

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I have seen it everywhere; in airports, funerals, office, school and in relationships. Some people are able to say goodbye in the moment and once it is over they move on with their lives. Others are able to say goodbye well before it happens so that by the time the person is leaving they have dealt with their emotions and are at peace with the hand destiny has dealt them. Some people begin to say good bye after the person has left. They are able to put up a brave front and seem like they have it all together, only to fall apart once they understand that season of their lives is over. 

                                    

Goodbye is very much related to the seasons of our lives. Just like the earth has different seasons, I believe our lives are the same. People come into our lives for a season. If we are lucky, they live through the seasons and last a lifetime. Depending on the person, it may be a lifetime of joy or one of pain. 

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Nonetheless, it means that we need to cherish the people in our lives and appreciate them for the value they add to our existence. The good people in our lives who can look us in the eyes and tell us the bare-faced truth. The ones who stand by you even when you have been a horrible friend or family member. The awesome people on whose shoulders you can cry like a baby and know they will be there for you. Our families that love us to death and would move the earth and the oceans to make sure we have what we need. Our great and loving God who loves us and wants the best for us.

If it was up to me, some people would stay forever in my life and we would live in a village on some beach island for the rest of our lives together. Money would not be an issue. Life would be one big party and we would never have a care in the world.

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Our world is a different place. There is hunger, disasters, petty politics that add little value to our lives and great disparities in our human conditions. Dehumanizing poverty and conflict that rob the soul of the water of life. There are people who forgot how to smile and children that never had the chance to be happy.

Next time you have to say goodbye to someone, a situation or a place, ask yourself if you were all that you could have been. Did you add value? Given the chance to do it again would you have changed anything? Did you make some unfair assumptions or generalizations? Did you contribute to positive lasting change?

Sometimes goodbye is only a gift if we were able to do what we needed to do. Goodbye is a gift when we walk away from harmful or hurtful situations. Goodbye is a gift when we are embracing new challenges and opportunities. Goodbye is a gift when the season is over. When we can look back at the good, the bad and the ugly and see that this is the best thing that could ever have happened to us.

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Goodbye may not always feel like a gift. Sometimes it feels like your heart has been ripped apart; like the sun will never shine again or like you will never be able to smile again. Hang in there. When the birds have sang all day and the rain has stopped. When the wind has blown and all the leaves fall down. In the still moments of the night, when all you can hear is your heart beating. You can hear the still small voice in your heart say 'Fear Not'. The Creator of the universe has promised to never leave us or forsake us. You can trust Him.