Prayer of St Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
Amen.

The Power of the Mind

On Sunday my friend dared me to take the challenge. I was complaining on and on about something and she asked me to try and shut up about it then maybe I would think less about and maybe...just maybe...I could get it off my mind. Guess what? It worked! I am amazed! Today she asked me how I was doing and it took me a while to figure out what she was going on about. That is what I call a 200 % success rate!

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The mind is powerful. Wars are won in the mind long before the soldiers get onto the battlefield. With our minds we can rule the world and fashion hostile takeovers. With the same minds we can redefine failure and possibly get our fifteen minutes of fame or get into the Guinness book of records for all the wrong reasons. More like shame. It all starts and possibly ends in the mind.

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The Bible says that out of the fruit of our lips our lives are filled with good things. Such is the power of the mind and by extension the tongue. What would happen if we only thought of good things? Best case scenario, we would be always smiling, always happy because we expect good things to happen and maybe they would. Worst case scenario, we could turn into Mort, the Lemar on Penguins of Madagascar, living in our own bubble. You could count the times Mort is angry. They are few and far between. Mostly related to King Julien and the royal feet. Speaking of which, Vain has a face! Don't even get me started on that! Point is its worth a shot.

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I believe that we are who we think we are. For real. Our thoughts have a significant impact on our actions and view of life. It shows in the way we walk and talk; our countenance and our actions. How can you convince someone that you have what it takes to deliver on something if you cannot even convince yourself? Thank God for all the people who believed in us long before we ever did! Thanks to them and God we are who we are today. However, the buck also stops with us. Positive thinking like love is a choice. It is true that there are a myriad of issues and challenges in our daily lives. Sometimes enough to drive out all the hope in our hearts. Nonetheless, we need to believe the best for ourselves, it is the least we can do.

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I have wasted so much time in my life worrying about things that did not even happen. I have lost smiles, opportunities, Kodak moments I should have enjoyed more if I just chose to believe the best for my future. Life is short. Our best moments are ahead of us! Are you ready for them?

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The Gift of Goodbye

Saying goodbye is a journey. You have it all planned out in your head. How you will say it, the little speech and the final send off. I was watching a mother saying goodbye to her daughter the other day, she had it all figured out. Right up to the moment when her daughter left and she didn't know if she would ever see her again. Then the goodbye began. She broke into tears and cried for the next few months. 

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I have seen it everywhere; in airports, funerals, office, school and in relationships. Some people are able to say goodbye in the moment and once it is over they move on with their lives. Others are able to say goodbye well before it happens so that by the time the person is leaving they have dealt with their emotions and are at peace with the hand destiny has dealt them. Some people begin to say good bye after the person has left. They are able to put up a brave front and seem like they have it all together, only to fall apart once they understand that season of their lives is over. 

                                    

Goodbye is very much related to the seasons of our lives. Just like the earth has different seasons, I believe our lives are the same. People come into our lives for a season. If we are lucky, they live through the seasons and last a lifetime. Depending on the person, it may be a lifetime of joy or one of pain. 

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Nonetheless, it means that we need to cherish the people in our lives and appreciate them for the value they add to our existence. The good people in our lives who can look us in the eyes and tell us the bare-faced truth. The ones who stand by you even when you have been a horrible friend or family member. The awesome people on whose shoulders you can cry like a baby and know they will be there for you. Our families that love us to death and would move the earth and the oceans to make sure we have what we need. Our great and loving God who loves us and wants the best for us.

If it was up to me, some people would stay forever in my life and we would live in a village on some beach island for the rest of our lives together. Money would not be an issue. Life would be one big party and we would never have a care in the world.

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Our world is a different place. There is hunger, disasters, petty politics that add little value to our lives and great disparities in our human conditions. Dehumanizing poverty and conflict that rob the soul of the water of life. There are people who forgot how to smile and children that never had the chance to be happy.

Next time you have to say goodbye to someone, a situation or a place, ask yourself if you were all that you could have been. Did you add value? Given the chance to do it again would you have changed anything? Did you make some unfair assumptions or generalizations? Did you contribute to positive lasting change?

Sometimes goodbye is only a gift if we were able to do what we needed to do. Goodbye is a gift when we walk away from harmful or hurtful situations. Goodbye is a gift when we are embracing new challenges and opportunities. Goodbye is a gift when the season is over. When we can look back at the good, the bad and the ugly and see that this is the best thing that could ever have happened to us.

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Goodbye may not always feel like a gift. Sometimes it feels like your heart has been ripped apart; like the sun will never shine again or like you will never be able to smile again. Hang in there. When the birds have sang all day and the rain has stopped. When the wind has blown and all the leaves fall down. In the still moments of the night, when all you can hear is your heart beating. You can hear the still small voice in your heart say 'Fear Not'. The Creator of the universe has promised to never leave us or forsake us. You can trust Him. 

Run like a Kenyan!

I have always perceived myself as a person who enjoyed more than their fair share of healthy competition. Competition is good for sports, education and virtually anything. This world is tough and as the theory of evolution pointed out; only the fittest survive. In a world that is quickly acquainting us to the reality of limited opportunities we are left with no option but to put our best foot forward. It is the only way to survive.

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Competition is great because it helps you get to your destination. However, competition will not keep you on top. It doesn’t help you to maintain the status quo. It has been said before that it is easy to become a winner; it’s staying a winner that is a challenge. You have to rise above the standard and be the standard. In short: run your own race.

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 It takes a lot of effort to be the standard. You have to separate yourself from the accepted norm or standards and go over and beyond what is expected. When you run your own race you have a clearer picture of where you want to go and it makes it easier to focus on the task ahead; what the pros and cons are; the challenges and possible outcomes. It is funny that we should ever separate the two: competition and running your own race. They seem to be mutually exclusive events but they have linkages.

If you want to win, you must know the best time or the best score and surpass it. In Robert Greene’s book- the 48 laws of power, rule 19- Know who you are dealing with, highlights the importance of knowing your opponent.  You need to understand what you are up against; the odds and your chances of success. Consequently you come up with a strategy and win. Initially, you run against the standard but ultimately it is your own race because your opponent is your reference point only for the theoretical part for planning but not in the follow up actions that lead to success.

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Did I mention that it gets rid of all the drama! D-R-A-M-A seems to be an all encompassing reality in every sphere of our lives: entertaining in other people’s lives but an absolute nightmare when it glares it head into our intricately planned lives. It makes for great shows and comedy when watched from a distance, however it is the cause of many a sleepless night when it is near. Running your own race minimizes the drama of having to keep up with the joneses (Kamau’s or Otieno’s on a more local note).Time saved from the irrelevance of poking your nose into other people’s business is invested into worthy actions that lead to success hopefully on a much shorter time frame.

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Success acquires a much higher value based on the fact that it is linked to both short-term and long term objectives and hopefully your purpose in life. Success is more meaningful. One could definitely argue that success is success regardless of the semantics which may be true in some cases. All the same, I relish achievements that made the most sense to me long before they ever made sense to anyone else in the world. It is the secret behind my ever present smile. I believe that is the essence of running like a Kenyan: running to win and being the standard against which others measure themselves.

Half- Baked

After years of hating change and struggling to adjust to all the disappointments it left in its wake, I have changed my mind. I have mellowed as a result of all the beautiful surprises that change had for me. Now, I love change. I expect change. Human beings are dynamic. Situations are not static. Nothing is everlasting. 

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My strong dislike for change has now been replaced by one for half baked jobs. The funny thing about all this is that I am guilty of the same in some areas of my life. The strong dislike is definitely a step in the right direction. There is a huge difference between trying your best & failing and doing things half heartedly. It can only be likened to courting disappointment. Mediocrity is a close relative of half bakedness (If there ever was such a word). Sometimes when laziness abounds, they all come out to bask in the sun of disillusionment. 

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I am convinced that there is nothing worse than doing something half heartedly. You either do it or you don’t. Anything in the middle is a recipe for failure. Half hearted efforts are the reason behind some of our greatest challenges today. It is the reason why we have politicians who half wanted to serve us and half wanted to enrich themselves. Christians who half wanted to live for God and half wanted to live for themselves. Economies that are improving on one end and going to the dogs on the other end, as corruption flourishes. I am not a saint. I too, struggle with these things. 

The realization that you are half baked is a turning point. I have realized that I do not want half baked stuff in my life. Almost getting there. Always almost succeeding but never quite enjoying the fruits of success. 

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The story of my life cannot be that I almost got that promotion, almost did that masters, almost had a great relationship, almost helped my friend or almost had a great relationship with God. It has been said before that it is the thought that counts. However, even in those circumstances, the appreciation only comes after action. It would be more acceptable if I got a gift that was less than I had expected than to have received none at all. I do not quite see myself smiling after my friend announces that they almost got me a pair of heels! Then what? 

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What are the chances that a runner would win a gold medal if they almost practised? Or that you could enjoy a cake that was half baked. It would probably taste good on top but as soon as you tried to go deeper, you would realize that it may have been better to wait for it to be fully baked. The same case applies with half baked successes. They seem good initially but they are most bitter where they should have been sweetest. 

Life is too short to waste but long enough to see the consequences of your actions. Indecision and little thought out plans are the greatest drivers of mediocrity and failure. 

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Today, I challenge you to bake right. Get a good recipe (plan), all the right ingredients (strategy, tools and resources), set the right temperature (know your environment and the stakes) and get the timing right! Success is a result of well baked plans. Always remember to commit your plans to God and they will succeed. 

Sometimes……..

Sometimes we pray to God,

And we get what we prayed for,

Sometimes that makes us happy,

Sometimes, it makes us sad.

Sometimes we pray to God,

And we do not get what we prayed for,

Sometimes that makes us sad,

Sometimes, it makes us happy.

Sometimes we pray to God,

And we get the things we hoped for,

Sometimes that makes us happy,

Sometimes it makes our hearts even harder.

Sometimes we do not pray to God,

And we get what we did not pray for,

Sometimes that makes us happy,

Sometimes that makes us sad (Mike Abuli)

Sometimes we do not pray to God,

And we do not get what we hoped for,

And we never really know,

How things would have turned out,

When all we had to do was ask!

By

Wanjiku Murugami

Looking for Love

Looking for Love

It has been said before that I am in love with being in love. Maybe it’s the high I get from all the endorphins associated with the whole process. I am currently taking a break from relationships. My own version of relationships anonymous! I have been single 43 days:-) Maybe there is a shortfall of hot men. Better still, I am finally getting the hang of being single. Yay! I am learning a lot about myself and loving every moment. As my wise friend Judy says, knowing yourself eliminates the guesswork in life. As far as I can see it one of the most liberating things I have ever done. In my reflection about love and God's will, I came across this song by trip lee, a Christian hip hop artist. I like his two cents of love. More like a million shillings for me!

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All you’ve been searchin’ and lookin’ in all the wrong places
Search no more. love is here.

Hey i had to write this song ‘cause the masses are mistaken
They’ve confused the word love with infatuation
Its sad ‘cause when we lackin love the wrong path is taken
They missing out ‘cause getting true love is past amazing
It’s more than a passing statement, a short lasting craving
It ain’t refusing not to wait, it ain’t mad impatience
Some been tryna find love in that guy or gal they dating
And before long they hormones are fastly raging
Yeah true love is a must, but that ain’t love, it’s lustin’
Love would never ask you to ungodly stuff
Its honest plus, it ain’t wrong and hard to trust
Its everlasting and can’t happen when the heart’s corrupt
Resting on false love you must realized you’ll plummet
‘cause real love is much more than butterflies in ya stomach
Most of us are out of line ‘cause really the bottom line
Is we looking for love but ain’t sure what we tryna find

You tried the pleasures of this world but still there’s something missing
‘cause when you close your eyes at night you can feel your heart still searching
I know you tired of being let down so you look for love in all the wrong places
So search no more ‘cause it’s the life of Christ your soul’s been missing

We must learn that love is perfect, it never will fail
I’m ready to tell, its needed and forever prevails
It’s so glorious, i’m sure we need some more its true
The world’s confused and seems to have a distorted view
Most think love’s a sweet kiss, a nice statement in time
But don’t know that love is sacred, its patient and kind
It’s not filled with sinful jealousy, doesn’t brag and boast
It’s priceless and can’t be bought with a stack of dough
It’s so true. it’s not rude. it doesn’t seek its own
It’s selfless, i’m telling this because we need to know
It’s not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs
It forgives, it’s a blessing and forever is strong
It don’t delight in evil but it likes the truth
It’s liberating never fading and it’s righteous too
I’d like for you to put love first in here
It always protects, always trusts, hopes, and perseveres

I can’t stress enough the fact that love will never end
It’s eternal better than this other stuff so let it in
Such an unusual experience beyond expression
We need it, we gotta seek it, yeah love is a blessin’
Utter perfection, but something most guys will lack
So the remaining real question’s, “where you find it at?”
I know you wondering if you don’t wanna die and miss love
Seek Christ, ‘cause the bible says that god is love
For God so loved the world, He would redeem you and me
Yeah it was love that made Him bleed and cling to a tree
That’s the truth, so without the son you losing
He shows love and for that there’s no substitution
We try to fill the void with things of all sorts
But let us stop settling for things that fall short
He can be the lover of our souls turn now to Christ
Lookin’ for love? well true love is found in Christ

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This kind of love, I could get used to. Being in love with love is not such a bad thing after all!

Delayed Happiness

I don’t even know where to start. I am seated at the airport lobby listening to the rustling engines of the plane I was supposedly meant to leave on. How this mess came about is hard to explain. The person who was supposed to book my flight rode with me to the airport and wished me a safe flight, despite sending everyone but me an email that clearly stated that I would not be on this particular flight. 

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Sounds like an episode right out of “La Revancha”- The Revenge, a common Mexican Soap Opera that aired on local television when I was growing up. As luck would have it, I have also already lost my room at the hotel where I was staying and the number to other only decent hotel I could stay at is perpetually busy. Seems like I am just about to discover the dingy River road motels and lodgings this side of Somalia! It is obvious: misfortune favours those not copied on the email! Weirdly though everyone keeps walking up to me to find out how I am doing or waving greetings in the air in Swahili. After bragging endlessly about my newly acquired looks of a rich Somali woman, the thought that I am conspicuously Kenyan is a welcome surprise. 

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However, it doesn’t explain the numerous women who after politely saying hi have proceeded to update me on the latest happenings in Somali language after which I smiled and nodded my head in agreement. The few weeks I have spent here have opened my eyes to see just how much I love Nairobi and Kenya in general.

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 It’s the freedom, climate, awesome friends and family that could never allow me to enjoy long periods away from my beloved country. Almost one hour later, the driver is here to pick me up and I am off back to the office……….last place I want to be and luckily, I have managed to get a room in the same hotel! Apparently my flight has been delayed. I cannot help but wonder what good things are in store for me now that I have been granted one more day in this extremely beautiful land. It may be a second chance for me a to catch up on my piling workload. This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it! 

Harsh Realities

Have you ever thought you were through with something only to discover that you were not? That is me right now. I have spent a considerable amount of time celebrating victories over battles that now seem far from over. I cannot for the life of me figure out how this has happened. The joy, the freedom and the change all felt very real to me! I pride myself in being someone who is in touch with their inner self. How then do I wake up one morning to realize that the impending possibility of unemployment was enough to keep me up all night looking for jobs? 

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I have spent a considerable amount of time acting and feeling like I am in control of all my affairs. I would like to think that I still hold that position. However, I do have to come to terms with the fact that I need to be more patient with myself. Sometimes one could suffer from a bout of worry or discouragement….not a good thing but it happens. What you do after the event is all that matters. 

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Life can be strange at times. Battles can be won and yet you lose the war and sometimes what may seem like a failure may end up being the greatest achievement in your life. It’s all about perspective. How your current situation relates to the bigger picture. As human beings we sometimes long for things that we think would make us happier or more fulfilled and do not get them only to discover much later in life that that was the best thing that could have ever happened to you! Not being able to predict your future is one of the limitations of a human being. The idea that what you do or do not do today may or may not have a significantly positive or negative impact on your life ten years from now or simply in the next one hour is daunting! 

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Personally, I choose to entrust all my worries and fears to God. I trust that He orders my steps and that everything that happens in my life is in His hands. All of it. The good, the bad and the ugly. This is why I can afford to smile and to be happy because the Creator of the universe is watching over me. I don’t have to worry or fear as long as I stay in His will and walk in His ways because He will perfect all that concerns me. When Jesus said that He came so that we can live life and live abundantly, He meant it. However, you have to decide if you want this to be true for your life and to what extent. Do you want to give Him some of your life, half of your life or ALL of it? I have tried the ALL part and all I can say is…..I could get used to living like this! Abundantly!

The Nows…...

There is a thin line between encouragement and deception. One could spur you on to greater heights while the other could potentially lead to the same thing but once discovered, could mean the loss of all gains achieved. Who draws the line between I have had enough and I need to be more patient.

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These two have a great history and have led to some of the most tremendous successes in the world today; for some people they made all the difference. I am still struggling with the triplets: I made it, I am making it and I will make it. Who’s to say that the things I did yesterday are the cause of my success today? Sometimes it is what I didn’t do. Which brings us to: What if they are not?  

Today, I discovered someone I really trusted lied to me about their capabilities, and while I could spend all day thinking about why anyone would want to do that, I choose not to. I know you are thinking they lied they were better than they are….WRONG! The exact opposite, which is interesting in modern day Kenya! Then again, she is not even Kenyan! All the same I am caught in between the disappointment of discovering that they did it to cover for my inadequacies or if I want to be more philanthropic, to spur me on to greater heights! Sounds great doesn’t it? So, how come, I cannot stop wondering if I am any good or if she is very kind?

Nowadays  everyone seems to have a plan for success, a better way of doing things, a new way of thinking. It is always about the past and the future, seldom about the present. What about NOW. I would love to wake up every morning and know that I am living my best life now and that today is the best day of my life. Granted, I am beginning to sound like the countless books gracing book stores and markets all around the world waiting to tell us the new and awesome ways we can be better.

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What if all the stupid mistakes I made and all the fears I succumbed to have made me the strong person I am today? What if all my exes who are now ys have made me all the more ready for my next amazing relationship. I am not trying to justify our mistakes and failures and insecurities. All I am saying is that we only have one life. There is the possibility that if you read all the self help books in the world you would probably be a better person. Nonetheless, the very things we are ashamed of, our despicable actions and sordid pasts that we would rather forget have an immense impact on the decisions that we make today.

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If you ask me, I’d say we need to make a decision about how we want to live our lives TODAY because at the end of the day, it is all that matters. We never really know if we will get to live in the beautiful homes that we save up for or drive the expensive and extremely gorgeous cars that have us drooling all day or even meet our dream man or woman. At this very moment I have a treasure much greater than all the above. I have NOW. This very second, this very minute, this very hour and this very day! So, I am cherishing it! What about you?