The Nows…...

There is a thin line between encouragement and deception. One could spur you on to greater heights while the other could potentially lead to the same thing but once discovered, could mean the loss of all gains achieved. Who draws the line between I have had enough and I need to be more patient.

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These two have a great history and have led to some of the most tremendous successes in the world today; for some people they made all the difference. I am still struggling with the triplets: I made it, I am making it and I will make it. Who’s to say that the things I did yesterday are the cause of my success today? Sometimes it is what I didn’t do. Which brings us to: What if they are not?  

Today, I discovered someone I really trusted lied to me about their capabilities, and while I could spend all day thinking about why anyone would want to do that, I choose not to. I know you are thinking they lied they were better than they are….WRONG! The exact opposite, which is interesting in modern day Kenya! Then again, she is not even Kenyan! All the same I am caught in between the disappointment of discovering that they did it to cover for my inadequacies or if I want to be more philanthropic, to spur me on to greater heights! Sounds great doesn’t it? So, how come, I cannot stop wondering if I am any good or if she is very kind?

Nowadays  everyone seems to have a plan for success, a better way of doing things, a new way of thinking. It is always about the past and the future, seldom about the present. What about NOW. I would love to wake up every morning and know that I am living my best life now and that today is the best day of my life. Granted, I am beginning to sound like the countless books gracing book stores and markets all around the world waiting to tell us the new and awesome ways we can be better.

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What if all the stupid mistakes I made and all the fears I succumbed to have made me the strong person I am today? What if all my exes who are now ys have made me all the more ready for my next amazing relationship. I am not trying to justify our mistakes and failures and insecurities. All I am saying is that we only have one life. There is the possibility that if you read all the self help books in the world you would probably be a better person. Nonetheless, the very things we are ashamed of, our despicable actions and sordid pasts that we would rather forget have an immense impact on the decisions that we make today.

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If you ask me, I’d say we need to make a decision about how we want to live our lives TODAY because at the end of the day, it is all that matters. We never really know if we will get to live in the beautiful homes that we save up for or drive the expensive and extremely gorgeous cars that have us drooling all day or even meet our dream man or woman. At this very moment I have a treasure much greater than all the above. I have NOW. This very second, this very minute, this very hour and this very day! So, I am cherishing it! What about you?